I am not sure why I am playing music. Something keeps me going forward, and I don't know what it is. My mind wants to know why I am going in that direction; maybe you will be famous, perhaps it will be a job in the future. But I know this is not what is going on.
I am being led in a direction, but I don't know the destination. The process is enjoyable, but my logical brain keeps on asking why? But that doesn't only happen with music; everything in my life is like that.
I'm flowing in a stream, unknowingly moving to a goal that is not known. I am not sure about which instruments or direction I should be taking. I am currently playing the violin, tablas, shakuhachi, and piano; then, on the electronic side, I've created a nice setup with the Medusa from dreadbox, the mopho from DSI and the Model:Cycles from Elektron.
As you might figure out, I am not great at these instruments. I am mostly dabbling in all directions at the same time. My technical mind can bring them all together in a cohesive world; here was a test I did sampling all my instruments:
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